Emrick Reaches #3,000

I have been fairly critical of NBC in the past, and for good reason. Between their inept commentating, mismanagement of the Olympics, and trashing of Ryan Miller's reputation, the network has done little to earn my respect. Announcer Mike "Doc" Emrick, has not escaped my criticism, but his latest accomplishment deserves praise.

On Monday, as the Pittsburgh Penguins set to take on the Detroit Red Wings in a rematch from the two previous years' Stanley Cup Finals, Emrick was preparing to announce his 3,000th career pro hockey game. The game itself, played in Emrick's native Michigan, lived up to the occasion. It featured the NHL's brightest stars and best teams competing in a tightly contested match. Thanks to intervention from the Hockey Gods, the game was broadcasted by Versus, not NBC. As punishment for his frequent on-air stories that are unrelated to the game, Emrick was forced to have none other than Ed Olcyzk alongside for the milestone. And of course, Doc dragged out the old line about Edzo getting his first NHL win as a coach against Detroit.

Emrick should be lauded for his longevity and passion for the game. Three thousand games is the equivalent of over 36 NHL regular seasons, quite a long career for one who battled cancer. It cannot be denied that he keeps the NHL's best interests in mind, whether or not he is capable of fulfilling them. The guru would like to commend Mike Emrick on a such a momentous accomplishment. Congratulations Doc, from all here at Fantasy Guru 37's blog.

March Madness: Take 2

The guru would like to start by offering an apology to those who followed the advice of D-Money. The guru believed the featured bracketologist would make accurate, insightful predictions that would aid the loyal followers of this blog. Instead, D-Money has led to the demise of many readers, the guru included, who trusted in what appeared to be a solid bracket. Of the teams D-Money predicted to advance to the Elite Eight, only four remain, and we are in but just the Sweet Sixteen.

While it is easy to point fingers, we must acknowledge D-Money's efforts. He boldly stepped forth and made his prognoses known to the world. He was willing to help the masses, when called upon by the guru, by putting his reputation on the line. It should be stated, as much as it hurts, that we make our own decisions. While certain incorrect picks may have been more appealing as a result of his encouragement, we must admit that the brackets were filled in by ourselves, that we are the ones responsible for the outcomes of our entries, not those who simply discussed theirs.

However, there is one shred of good news. The second bracketologist the guru petitioned the help of, the one whose bracket will be shown below, made even more foolish predictions. Due to complications in email, the guru was unable to post this self-proclaimed expert's forecast until now. (Forecast, because, like meteorologists, he is only right half of the time.) While his incompetence is indicated by his inability to attach files, the guru trusted his peer (?) to produce a solid bracket. Fortunately, for those of you who would have based your decisions upon those of this second authority on the NCAA, his foresight was unavailable until now, at a time when, using hindsight, we can mock him.

Click here to see RyRy's bracket.

Along with his atrocious bracket, RyRy included the following thoughts.

Favorite: Kansas; They are deep, well coached, and tested. This is a great combination. Plus their road is not the most difficult. They are definately a Final Four favorite.

Underpreformer: Purdue; Ever since the loss of Hummel, the Boilermakers have not been the same. Do not be surprised with an early exit.

Sleeper: Temple; Many people are high on Cornell, and so was I until I saw their first round match up. Temple has shown their ability and has a chance to reach the Sweet Sixteen.

About that. Kansas failed to make the Sweet Sixteen. Purdue did. The Boilermakers are still alive. Same with Cornell. They eliminated Temple in the first round.

As previously stated, the guru is terribly sorry that the consultants he recommended and lauded performed so poorly. He entertained the thought of their inadequacy, dreadfully so, but in the end trusted in their abilities. Again he apologizes for the troubles he may have caused. You may now realize how bright the guru himself actually is. It is quite difficult to consistently make accurate predictions, as the guru does. I hope you now have a greater understanding of the guru's skills and abilities, and will check back frequently to take his advice, the advice of a truly capable and esteemed expert in this field.

March Madness: Take 1

Click the bracket to zoom in.

As previously stated, the guru knows little about basketball. Because of a strong desire to aid the fantasy community, he has found a way to bring wisdom to his followers. He feels their loyalty to this blog should not be underestimated. To help those who are participating in the guru-sponsored March Madness Bracket Pool, he has called upon the assistance of esteemed bracketologists. These bracketologists are no ordinary, self-proclaimed experts. They are experts in their field, widely respected by their peers. They will bring to you trusted, unbiased opinions. Remember, the guru will do whatever it takes to enlighten his followers. He cares deeply for their fantasy success.

The bracket above was submitted by a colleague the guru holds in the highest regard, D-Money. He has unselfishly given the guru and his followers special insight. Do not underestimate the wisdom of D-Money, for he is a veteran bracketologist. The guru hopes the following information will assist his followers in their predictions. He encourages participation in his March Madness Bracket Pool, in which the winner earns the privilege of competing against the guru himself in a fantasy football experts' league. Good luck to all competitors.

March Madness Bracket Pool 2010

I'll be quite honest with you. The guru knows little about the world of basketball. Realizing that the winner of a March Madness Bracket Pool would add a new dynamic to the 2010 Fantasy Guru 37 Fantasy Football Expert Challenge (2010 FG37FFEC, for short), he set up such a pool.

Any individual with an email address is eligible to compete. To enter, simply send an email to FANTASYguru37@gmail.com (got that RyRy?) with the following information: an alias/pen name (optional), your picks, and a score for the Championship Game. I would appreciate it if you formatted your picks in the following way to make scoring easier. List every team you predict to advance from the first round in one paragraph, preferably in a logical order. Do the same for each subsequent round until only one team is remaining. Indicate that this is the team you predict to be the National Champions. Include a score for the Championship Game, in which you indicate the scores for both the winning and losing teams.

You will receive 1 point for each correct team in the first round, 2 for the second round, 4 for the regional semifinals, 8 for the regional finals, 16 for the semifinal, and 32 for correctly predicting the National Champion. Tie-breaking procedures are as follows:

1. Closest to the total score (sum of home and away scores) for the Championship Game.

2. Closest to the score of the winning team for the Championship Game.

3. Closest to the score of the losing team for the Championship Game.

*The formula for determining the closest to the scores is as follows:

X=/(actual score) - (predicted score)/

There is no charge to enter the pool. Sending money will not increase your chances of winning. Only one entry per email address. In the case of multiple entries, only the first entry will be scored. All entries are due by 8:00 AM (0800 hours) on the morning of March 18, 2010.

The winner will receive a special invitation to compete against the guru himself in a highly competitive fantasy football league. Good luck to all challengers. Remember, only the best and brightest gain access to the FG37FFEC.

NBC's Latest Gaffe

It does not come as a surprise to followers of this blog to see me ripping on NBC. Nor does it come as a surprise to see NBC making mistakes. But I assure you that what you are about to read will change your opinion of the broadcasting company for quite some time. For those of you still willing to give them a chance, I expect that to change. For those of you who hate them with a passion, here's some fuel for that fire. The following will expose NBC for the incompetent, nonsensical company they are.

I have enjoyed a long, successful career (since January) as one of the nation's most popular (18 followers) journalists. I possess a deep understanding of conducting interviews with high-profile athletes (my cousins). Therefore, believe each and every statement I make about the world of journalism.

There are many components to conducting an interview, some more complicated than others. You must identify potential candidates, instill in them an interest to speak with you, create an open, welcoming speaking environment with non-invasive questions. These can be difficult, especially when dealing with high-profile athletes who have little time to waste, more important matters to attend to, and need a complication-free environment to succeed. (cough, remember this, cough)

The easiest step, by far, is to confirm that the person you're interviewing is really the person you say he or she is. When you're famous, people know who you are, what you sound like, your personality, etc. When you're recognized for greatness and considered a hero by your countrymen, you expect these very same countrymen to respect your reputation. It's not too much to ask.

Well, it's too much to ask of NBC. As the starting goaltender for Team USA, Ryan Miller was getting prepared for his Gold Medal Game against either Canada or Slovakia, at which point the competitor was yet to be determined. With little time to waste, important matters to attend to, and in need of a complication-free environment, he was off doing his own thing, minding his own business, trying his best to avoid attention. And that's right where NBC stepped in to throw a wrench into Miller's plans.

As NBC commentator Willie Geist prepared for his interview with Miller, he was likely trying to create the welcoming environment discussed earlier. But because he works for NBC, he was incapable of doing so. The man he was about to speak with was not Ryan Miller. It was a random Joe off the street who felt like pranking our great nation's "must see TV," or so they call themselves.

Being the astute journalist he is, the guru managed to uncover a video of the event. It very clearly and objectively depicts the story that transpires. I highly recommend watching it so that you may gain a fuller grasp on the situation.

First of all, Willie, "deepfully" is not a word. I understand that you aren't on top of your game right now, but a man in your line of work should be able to speak coherently. As for Chris Matthews, he couldn't care less because nobody watches his show anyway.

Here is a video of another interview conducted with Miller. Watch this clip to see Miller speak with a competent broadcaster.

Click this link to see Miller's real personality.

Clearly, Miller is by no means a cocky guy. His character contrasts sharply with that of Joe Schmoe who managed to dupe NBC with nothing but a cell phone. His reputation was put on the line by a company incapable of performing the easiest of tasks correctly. Being the classy guy he is, Miller appeared on NBC to set things straight and accept an apology from the network.

That's where the guru comes in. Most of you are unaware of the incident. You may have heard Miller "guaranteeing" Gold and eating his words. What you likely didn't hear was that the mistake was not his, it was NBC's. Afraid to show the nation their blunder, they made a quick apology on a show few people watch. The guru is here to rectify the situation. Ryan Miller is a class act who was unwillingly put into this situation. He needs every medium possible to salvage his public image. Don't let NBC's error tarnish your view of Miller, a guy who shows nothing but class.

NHL Trade Deadline Review Part II

The guru is back to discuss the NHL Trade Deadline, which froze all trades at 3:00 PM Wednesday. The guru covered the roster turnovers of the Eastern Conference leaders in his last post. Today, I am going to focus on the roster overhaul of the Western Conference.

Things are heating up in the desert as the Coyotes find themselves in 4th place in the West. GM Don Maloney made plenty of noise on Deadline Day, preparing his team for what could be their first playoff berth since 2002. The most notable acquisition is that of left wing Wojtek Wolski, swapped for Peter Mueller and prospect Kevin Porter. Wolski brings a spark to the NHL's 24th ranked offense, averaging a paltry 2.56 goals per game. Coyotes fans will have a tough time parting with Mueller, who has disappointed since his 54 point rookie campaign. Down the road, Phoenix fans will see Mueller scoring at a high pace and regret this trade. In reality, Mueller simply needs a change of scenery, as does Wolski. This trade will benefit the team now, and considering their lack of playoff berths, now is the time. Maloney also brought in forward Lee Stempniak from Toronto, another player who has yet to live up to his potential. I see Stempniak on the scoresheet four out of every five games here on out, working both zones and seeing time on the penalty kill. Petteri Nokelainen gives the Coyotes another defenseman capable of playing 15-20 minutes a game, staying out of trouble. He's the type of guy who is at his best when he goes unnoticed. Although he is currently on the mend, the acquisition of defenseman Mathieu Schneider will pay dividends when the playoffs roll around. Despite his age, Schneider is a good two-way defenseman that will help the Coyotes struggling powerplay, currently dead last in the NHL at 14.9%. He brings with him a wealth of experience and and a desire to win in what could be his final season. Maloney's wheeling and dealing greatly improves his squad and gives them a much better chance of contending with San Jose and Chicago in the playoffs.

For a team coming off of consecutive trips to the Cup Finals, and the expectations that come as a result, the Red Wings were quiet over the Deadline, despite being out of the playoffs if the season ended today. Of the four players moved in and out of Hockeytown, only one of them has recorded a point this season. While I must acknowledge that they have a long list of studs returning from injury, the replacements (AKA "depth") have not been living up to Detroit standards. The top prospect in the system, the ultra-talented Ville Leino, (I wouldn't pass to Hossa either, even if it was my first career game.)(commentating rivaling the low level of NBC) was dealt to Philadelphia in early February. What shouldn't be discounted is the wealth of experience gathered by the new millennium's dynasty. However, this may become the first season since 1990-91 that the Wings won't have home-ice advantage in the first round of the playoffs. And yes, you read that correctly.

This year's Trade Deadline may have lacked transactions involving big-name players, especially in the West. But keep in mind, before the Olympics we saw Ilya Kovalchuk dealt for fantasy hockey's early season must-have Niclas Bergfors. Also traded were guys like Dion Phaneuf and J.S. Giguere, discussed by the guru at the time of the swap.

The playoff race is heating up as teams across the NHL are gearing up for the stretch run. With their new facelift, the Coyotes are looking like a threat to San Jose and Chicago, the long expected Conference Finals opponents. Detroit can never be counted out, but right now they aren't even in the discussion for Western supremacy. Be sure to check back for more analysis from the guru and enjoy the great hockey down the stretch.

Image of the Week

NHL.com's Frozen Moment

This week's image, pirated from NHL.com, portrays hockey idol Don Cherry performing a ceremonial puck drop before last week's Toronto-Boston throwdown. Cherry, famous for his insensitive comments and taste in suits (Don Cherry and Barry Melrose, best broadcasting combination ever), is a hero to all Canadians (In 2004 he was voted #7 Greatest Canadian.) and therefore, all true hockey fans. To put it simply, if you don't know who Don Cherry is, you are not a hockey fan. End of discussion.

Cherry has led a long and storied life. Because there is simply too much to discuss on an Image of the Week post, I will promise you, my devoted followers (click link in sidebar on the right to follow me), a more in-depth look into Don Cherry's life sometime in the near future.

Special thanks to the Caboose for alerting the guru of this fine image.

NHL Trade Deadline Review Part I

In the eyes of many, this year's trade deadline was rather pedestrian. It's arguable that the biggest names moved on Wednesday were Ryan Whitney and Lubomir Visnosky. While the guru expected the Olympic semi-deadline to put a ceiling on the tradable talent, he was still surprised by the lack of star power sent packing. But these meat and potatoes deals will have their effects when playoff hockey begins.

Despite leading the NHL in points and dominating the Eastern Conference with a league high +73 goal differential (Pittsburgh 2nd in the East at +21), Washington GM George McPhee felt it necessary to address weak spots in his team's roster. Most notably, Joe Corvo was acquired from Carolina to bolster the defense. He brings with him a -6 in the +/- department, but considering he was playing for the Hurricanes sans Cam Ward, that figure is not as bad as it seems. Also in an attempt to strengthen the blueline, McPhee brought in Milan Jurcina, who spent the last four seasons in Washington before signing with Columbus last offseason. In his four years as a Capital, Jurcina posted a +36 in 211 games. The move the guru expects to be the most beneficial is the acquisition of forward Eric Belanger. A good two-way player who is adept at killing penalties, Belanger will benefit from the removal of the shackles placed upon him by Minnesota's trapping style of play. In what can only be describes as theft, Washington won the Scott Walker auction with...a seventh round draft pick? While Walker's numbers are laughable (5 points in 33 games), he has been in the league since 1995 and will bring some veteran leadership to a team relying on young guns like Ovechkin, Semin, and Backstrom. One position McPhee failed to address is that of the goaltender, where former Vezina Trophy winner Jose Theodore (way back in 2002) has split time with the young Semyon Varlamov. Theodore's play has trailed off since the lockout and we all know the potential for disaster that arises from starting an inexperienced goalie in the playoffs. Just ask Carey Price.

The defending Stanley Cup champions are finetuning their roster as well. GM Ray Shero was active on Deadline Day, adding a few pieces to the Atlantic Division leaders. The Alexei Ponikarovsky deal will garner the most attention. The left wing has amassed 41 points thus far in Toronto, just one shy of the third most in Pittsburgh. The Poni Express (The guru proudly acknowledges that he did not bestow this nickname upon the 29-year-old.) brings with him a +5 rating, quite laudable for a member of the Maple Leafs, owners of a 51 goal deficit in the differential column. At 6'4" and 220 lbs, Ponikarovsky will make a statement in his first post-lockout playoff action. (The FG 37 Curse has not yet been recognized by sports fans across the country.) Shipped off to Toronto (and New Jersey the day after) in exchange for Ponikarovsky, Martin Skoula's absence left a vacancy on the Penguins' blueline. Shero filled the gap with Jordan Leopold, brought in from the Panthers. (Fantasy tip from the guru: add Keith Ballard.) In addition to depth, this deal gives Head Coach Dan Bylsma a versatile defenseman he can plug in on the powerplay or penalty kill. Expect this squad to make a lot of noise come playoff time.

The guru will be back soon to continue the discussion of the deadline. Up next: a closer look at the Western Conference, including the new players brought into the deserts of Arizona. Be sure to check back to see the guru's take on the new NHL landscape, the would-be All Star teams, and as always, NBC's incompetence. Plus, details on the guru's own March Madness Bracket Pool, including a chance to win a spot in the guru's 2010 Fantasy Football Experts League.

Image of the Week

brisbanetimes.com

This week's image captures Canada's celebration after winning the Gold Medal in Men's Ice Hockey on Sunday. Jarome Iginla slid a pass in overtime to Sidney Crosby, whose 5-hole shot beat tournament MVP Ryan Miller, lifting the hosts over the Americans.

The image is centered around Crosby, who doubles as the posterboy of the NHL and the entire nation of Canada. It is truly fitting that he scored the winning goal. However, to those who had a say, and to the fans in Pittsburgh, Miller was deserving of MVP honors.

However, Crosby will walk away happier, especially after the Penguins win in the rematch against Buffalo two days later.

The entire nation of Canada erupted at once as their team won Gold. The men's victory was preceded by Canada's women's team, who also faced the USA in their Gold Medal Game. Winning Gold, especially against the Americans who given them their only loss, was of indescribable importance to the entire country. In addition to joining the USA with a Gold Medal celebration Image of the Week, the Canadians can once again claim the title of the best hockey country in the world, a title they crave more than any other.